K.J. Apa’s Tits Bring Back Nautica From The Dead!

March 9, 2020
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@kennethcappello
A post shared by KJ Apa (@kjapa) on Mar 5, 2020 at 1:24pm PST

My fellow 90s kids might remember that back in middle school no one was going to fux with dudes sporting Nautica haute couture. Oversized Nautica gear was the ~lewk~ and mamaw, if a man wasn't sporting deeply discounted JC Penny gigantic Nautica boxers, then he wasn't worth your time. If I don't see Nautica bloomers, I won't go chasing his waterfall ifyaknowwhatimean.

Anyway, all of this brings us to Riverdale's resident faux-ginger quarter-Saoman creamboat K.J. Apa, who just singlehandedly brought the Nautica brand back from the dead! He posted a shirtless pic to Instagram, and while there's plenty to focus on here including Apa's gorgeous bawdy and sexay tats, people are taking notice of his underwear. For example last week's Body of Work actor Emile Hirsch posted:

Nautica execs popping champagne bottles in their offices rn

That's sweet that he thinks Nautica still has execs. Everyone knows it's run by a board of 90s middle schoolers. The secret to the brand's success? A time machine.

Apa lets us know that the pic was snapped by renowned celeb photographer Kenneth Cappello, so something tells me we might be getting an artsy throwback spread from these two in the near future. Brands like Fila and Champion have enjoyed a second wind with Gen Zers, so why can't Nautica? Hell, let's get some Bugle Boy up in hur!