It’s So Hard To Find Good Help For Cristiano Ronaldo In The New Armani Jeans Ad

Last week we brought you the 30-second cock teasing trailer for his Cristiano Ronaldo's Armani Jeans commercial. Now you can see how the complete version could hope to improve upon those original, blissful few moments of Ronaldo-crotch.

In last week's teaser trailer, Ronaldo stalks around his room in slow motion wearing naught but the skimpiest of briefs while his model-maid dusts and arranges things in the background. It turns out that the Portuguese soccer star (and thanks to the many of you who corrected us on this) was simply searching for his Armani Jeans and favorite T-shirt. Ronaldo looks too good topless so the sexy maid hides his shirt under a couch cushion. The end.

Forgive us if we sound a little unenthused, but with all the hype we were expecting this to devolve into some sort of orgy (hopefully involving a couple of his soccer-playing buddies). We were at least hoping that the sexy maid would inspire him to strip back down to his undies, and to perhaps get rid of those as well. This commercial leaves pretty much no hope for the lusty conclusion we so desperately crave. Now he's probably just going to go back to his closet and toss on a button-up that will show off even less of his body—lame. If anybody want to make up some appropriately hot slash fiction about where this commercial should have gone or, even better, a looping animated gif of Ronaldo's brief-wearing crotch, we'd be forever grateful.

· Cristiano Ronaldo in "Housekeeping" (Full Video) (youtube.com)