Bobby Calamitous’ Goodbye Extravaganza

I should have said something about this before, I know, but today is my last day writing for Fleshbot. To commemorate such a momentous occasion, I've picked out my 10 favorite posts from my career as a porn blogger.

Wow, it's weird to not be writing for Fleshbot in the first person plural. But yes, that's right, I'm leaving this provincial shanty town for bigger and better things. And when I say "bigger and better things," I mean slave away at a decidedly uncreative but lucrative corporate desk job so I can pay off those student loans. Chuh-ching! But I will really miss you guys, and Fleshbot. I've spent my entire life wanting to be a professional writer, and working for this website has been a dream come true. So thank you readers for checking out my stuff over the past seven months. Thank you Gay Fleshbot commenters for being so incredibly loyal and giving me something to look forward to with every post. And thanks, most importantly, to Lux and Brian, who gave me this wonderful opportunity, who taught me every damn thing I know about the job and the industry, and who are two incredible people and worthy of worship. (Seriously, on your knees, fuckers.) Oh God, now I'm getting all teary and shit. Just check out my favorite posts and stop looking at me.

[jwplayer id="7182074"]

Fleshbot Presents: The US Premiere of Bruce La Bruce's XXX "LA Zombie": If I didn't impress upon you how much I loved this movie with that absolutely gushing review, then hopefully this clip from one of the movie's opening scenes can do the work for me. Bruce La Bruce is truly a master of putting freaky shit on camera.

The Top Ten Most Booty Shakingest Booty Shakers Of Xtube: Please, do yourself a favor. Go here, and watch this guy dance to Shakira's "She-Wolf." I still can't get over it.

Yeah, You Make Pretty Awesome Gay Porn—For A Lesbian! Ha!: Lux introduced me to the work of Shine Louis Houston, and for this I will be forever grateful. Now that I won't have easy access to all the porn I want, I'm thinking Heavenly Spire will be first on my list of memberships to purchase.

One Of The Stars of "K-Town," i.e. The Asian Jersey Shore, Is Also A Pornstar: Remember the Korean version of "The Jersey Shore" that never happened? Well, cast member and part time pornstar Peter Le maintains as powerful a hold on my imagination as ever.

"High Contrast Cock" Blog Shows You Penis As You've Never Seen It Before: I don't know why but I fucking love all of this guy's photos. No, they're not particularly erotic, but when you spend so much time looking at the male sex organ in an erotic way, it's nice to have a chance to see it in another light. Also, penis eating a small gourd!

Bel Ami's Army of Genetically Engineered Gay Übermensch Boggles The Mind:This may very well be one of the most fantastically terrifying images ever produced by a porn studio. They look like a friggin' ant colony. A sexy one, but still.

Watch Jim Carrey Fuck The Hell Out Of Some Dude With A Handlebar Mustache: Watching The Pet Detective pound some dude in what looks like a seedy motel? Growing up is weird.

In Defense of Michael Lucas: One of the most interesting things I've learned during my time at Fleshbot and working with Gawker Media is the ways in which blogging has become such a highly visual medium. Most of my favorite posts are centered on images and video, but I did really enjoy writing up this post about Michael Lucas. I ended up having an hour long phone chat with the guy after this came out and let me just say, he's really nice...and a few other adjectives I'm keeping to myself.