Let’s See Sexiest Pictures Of Dreamy Cubs Player Kris Bryant

November 3, 2016
HIS_EXCELLENCY

Last night was one hell of a time for Cubs fans everywhere, because after a 108 year World Series drought they finally brought home the trophy with all the flags! Does the fact that sexy third baseman Kris Bryant got plenty of screen time on Fox make everything just a little sweeter? Yes, yes it do! If you stayed up to catch all of the action - which carried into the fucking 10th inning - you'll know that it was a super fun game to watch, and the Cubs pulled out of a tight spot with an 8-7 win against the Indians.

SPEAKING OF A TIGHT SPOT. You'll also know that the sexy lineups on both teams could combine to make some amazing porn, with players ranging from terrifying but sexy extras in Mad Max to blue-eyed gods with cocky smirks that make your taint feel like it's singing on a mountain top! Actually, it's more like one blue-eyed god with a cocky smirk that make your taint feel like it's singing on a mountain top, whose name is Kris Bryant, and who is one of the fucking sexiest things to ever walk this planet! Let's... explore.

24-year-old Kris Bryant stands at, gasp, 6' 5", and has piercing blue eyes, a luscious head of hair, a perfectly trimmed beard, and all the swagger you can handle. He also knows his way around balls, and last night fielded the winning toss that sent the Indians sulking off the field. Here's where your heart pitters and you splatter. The adorable Kris Bryant closed out the game with a boyish grin on his face, and it looks like it's going to go down in sports history because everyone and their mom is talking about it. I didn't even have to make this GIF!

Awwwwww, I'm seriously dead. Now it's time to celebrate this historic Cubs World Series win the Fleshbot Gay way. Check out the sexiest pictures of Kris Bryant below, including a hot (and rare because it's the only one I can find) shirtless picture. Go Cubs go!