Ask Chad Love & Dating: Botox Boyfriends, Jilted Besties, & Drag

Ask Chad Love & Dating: Botox Boyfriends, Jilted Besties, & Drag

Hello, Sexies! Sorry to report that I got a cold this week. So not cute, especially when you’re trying to service a hot guy and you have snot running down your nose. My cold forced me to stay in bed and watch Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. The only reason I want to stay in bed all day is the obvious – hooking up! I’m feeling better so hoping to up my hookup numbers this weekend, now that I can breathe! How was your week?

Keep those dating, sex, and love questions coming in, Sexy Bitches, I love reading them! Just like my Sniffies profile says, nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Dear Chad,

 My husband and I have been married for 5 years, and we were dating for three years before that. Let’s just say we’ve been together for a long time, especially in gay years. Well, over the last two years, my hubbie (whom I love and adore) has become obsessed with cosmetic procedures. It started off as just a little Botox here and there and now it has gotten out of hand. He’s added cheek fillers and lip fillers, has gotten his eyebrows dyed, and his most recent procedure was a hair graft that left his face puffy for a week and made him leave work until he thought he looked normal. Here’s the thing, he doesn’t need any of it! Not only is he starting to look ridiculous, but he is also bleeding our savings dry with all of this work. I love him deeply but I feel I am losing him to all of this face work. Help!

Botox Boyfriend

Dear Botox Boyfriend,

Oh, man! This is such a slippery slope. I can’t tell you how many gay brunches I’ve been to just to look around and see that most of the gays there look like they’ve been stretched over plastic. Yes, we are all obsessed with our looks in some way, and being gay adds a lot of pressure, especially when are in the dating pool and want to get noticed. But it is like getting a tattoo, once you start, there is no stopping. It sounds like your husband may be going through a midlife crisis, and it probably has nothing to do with you. As we gays get older, we want to clutch on to our youth as hard as we can. Sometimes we just have to age gracefully and accept that, yes, even the gays age. You need to talk to your husband and tell him you think he is going too far. It sounds like maybe he needs to be communicating with you a lot more about what he is going through and what he is feeling. I think some therapy might help. He needs to come to terms with his aging and maybe talking it through with a professional would be beneficial. After he gets some help, let me know if he has any Botox CCs left over to donate. LOL.

_____

Hey Chad,

My best friend, after a long time of being single, is dating this new guy. This guy is much younger than him and is taking up all his time. My bestie and I used to hang out pretty much every day and text each other about 100 times a day. Now, because of this new guy, I never see him. Or if I get the rare chance to see him, he’s always with his new boo and all they do is makeout. I understand that he’s happy to be dating, and I’m glad for him. But not only do I think this will fizzle out quickly, I miss my friend! I’m not saying we have to have it like before but, Jesus, a hangout every now and then shouldn’t be out of the question. What’s a bestie to do?

Jilted Bestie

Dear Jilted Bestie,

I’ve been there! The funny thing, I’m usually that annoying younger guy! LOL. Unfortunately, you need to let your bestie sow his oats in dating this guy. If you think it will fizzle away, then chances are, it will. If your bestie has been single for a while, he is just making up for lost time and you just need to give him the space to enjoy it. He knows that you are there for the long run and will always be there. That being said, you do need to mention to him that, as his friend, you still would like to see him from time to time. Communicate your feelings so you get it out, but also let him run loose for a bit. Maybe you need to start dating someone younger too. What’s your credit score? I’m free!

_____

Dear Chad,

The guy I started dating does drag as a hobby. I had no idea until he invited me to his show. Our dating period just started to it is fresh and we are still learning a lot about each other. I have not been to his place yet (we always go to mine), but I envision it is full of lashes and wigs. I don’t mind drag, but I’m not an uber fan. And, unfortunately, he is not very good at all. I went to see the show he was appearing at and he looked terrible. His makeup was off, his lipsynch was bad, and the audience was lukewarm. I didn’t even know what to say, it was just really bad. How should I approach this?

Drag Doubts

Dear Drag Doubts,

Everyone thinks that because we are gay we can all do drag. This is just not the case. I’m not sure if I could be dating a drag queen because I, too, love the spotlight and like the attention on me! LOL. Here’s the thing, who are you to judge his hobby? If it brings him joy and he gets to live life onstage, so be it. If he’s terrible, oh well! That isn’t your place to tell him. He will figure it out and even if he doesn’t, he’s having fun. I do know that drag, even as a hobby, can take up a lot of someone’s time. So if you can’t go to Palm Springs for the weekend because he has gigs, that might be an issue. Can you deal with someone doing drag? You don’t need to be at every show, but you should show some support if you intend to keep dating this guy, even if he does suck. It is early in your courtship so if it isn’t for you, no harm no foul. P.S. I can give your boo some contouring tips!

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