How To Take A Good Dick Pic

How To Take A Good Dick Pic

This week we ran across yet another funny post from social media king and entertainer Corey O'Brien. In one of his recent posts, he does a parody of how straight men take a dick pic using a banana as his prop. Needless to say, it was spot on, even down to the DL "bro face" guys tend to use when photographing their junk. Though he calls out straight men for their dick pic-taking skills, we recognize many of those poses from what we've seen on Grindr. Some of y'all need some instruction so we wanted to share some easy tips next time you want to whip it out for a photo shoot. Whether or not we asked for one, if you send us a penis selfie, make it look good!

 

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A post shared by Corey O'Brien (@corey_obrien)

We know we some angles make us look better than others. Also, the proportion can be skewed depending on how you are holding the lens in relation to your face and junk. Here's the thing, if you are taking a dick pic and trying to make it look thicker or bigger than it really us, that's not really fair advertising. If you are sending out this kind of picture on hookup sites, eventually we are going to see it in person and know it isn't as big or thick as you would have us believe. Sometimes this can cause awkward moments during the hookup, and some size queens will just pack up their stuff and leave. Make it look pretty, but also make sure it represents what we are going to see face to dick in the bedroom!

Less is more? Sometimes seeing a bulge in underwear is hotter than just an aggressive dick in the frame. Also, you can play with outlines and shadows to give us a hint as to what you're packing without giving away just a blatant penis. Make it artful, make it pretty. It will add to the sensuality and build anticipation. Also, if you are on the smaller side, add other body parts to the frame, like your abs, chest, or even butt cheeks to add more attention to the total package rather than just on the junk .

No face! Who knows where your dick pic will end up. The web can be a vicious place and once you send one out to someone, it is fair game. Our suggestion, do not put your face in the frame. Especially if you have a job that can be on the conservative side. You would be surprised how some pictures get out there and where they will, pardon the pun, pop up.

 

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Lighting is everything. Don't just put your junk in harsh lighting. It will not make it look pretty, no matter how nice it might be. Add warm lighting, avoid a lot of shadows, and set the mood. There's a reason professional photographers use correct lighting. It makes it all better. We don't want your junk looking like a deer in headlights.

Background is everything! We would be millionaires if we got paid for every time we got a penis selfie taken in a dirty bathroom with grimy mirrors. We also don't need to see a messy bedroom in the background. Also check for family photos in your room, stuffed animals in the frame, or sex toys (unless that's your thing) flopping around. Trust us, we will be looking at the whole picture.

Hygiene. Trim your bush, wash your foreskin, clean your fingernails. We are gonna zoom and we are going to look at every detail. We have received dick pics being held by hands that look like they haven't been washed in ages. Not cute.

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