Ask Chad Love & Dating: Fickle Friends, Short BFs, Side of Sperm

Ask Chad Love & Dating: Fickle Friends, Short BFs, Side of Sperm

Hello, Sexies! What a week, huh? I don’t even know what to say other than we are resilient, we are bitches, and we will survive. I just hope that as many of you who were looking on Grindr on Election Day also voted! Polls before holes! As a side note, I was shocked there were so many profiles on Grindr and Sniffies that wanted MAGA sex. Are you crazy? Sigh. Oh, you gays. Anywayyy…moving on, because we have no other choice.

Keep those dating, sex, and love questions coming in, Sexy Bitches, I love reading them! Just like my Sniffies profile says, nothing is off limits: [email protected]

Dear Chad,

 I’ve been going through a lot this year. I lost my mom, I lost my job, and life has just been pretty shitty. I don’t even have the energy for dating, nor do I want to until life gets better. Here’s the thing. I have always been the breadwinner of my circle of friends. It is not unusual for me to have picked up the bill or bought rounds of drinks or theatre tickets or such. I just love giving when I’m able to. Now that things are different, I feel like my friends are not checking in on me, they aren’t being there for me in the same way that I have been there for them. I feel a bit used and depressed. I’ve had these friends for years, so it sucks. Advice?

Fickle Friends

Dear Fickle Friends,

This really sucks, and not in a good way. It’s always easy to be friends with someone when things are going great and the money is flowing. I have found that when the tough get going, the friends go a-going. And, I hate to say it, many of us gays can be superficial and while we will be first in line for a free dinner, we will be last in line to check in with anyone while they are going through things. Here’s the thing, it has been a tough year for many of us. The job searches are slow, the economy is not too great, and things just seem to be out of sorts. It is easy to get down and depressed, especially if you feel your friends have not been there for you. I would focus less on your so-called circle of friends and focus on you. You are clearly going through some life changes and now is the opportune time to focus on your metal and physical health. Instead of going out at night, go hiking. Instead of having to do brunch with your “friends,” go to the movies by yourself. It might be life telling you to stop and take stock of who you are surrounding yourself with. It sounds like you need to add to your friendship circle some fresh personalities who want to get to know you for you and not what you have to offer. Join some new social clubs, get online, and meet some new people. If your friends feel you drift away, they can either be concerned and fight for the friendship, or they will just float away and leave room for people who deserve to be at the table. Just because your wallet is having issues right now does not mean that you have less worth. Do you boo, and have fun doing it. You don’t need fake friends right now, or any time.

_____

Hey Chad,

I have been dating this new guy. He is really cute and we have a great time. But, he is really really short. He doesn’t qualify as a little person, but he is very very tiny. Let’s just say he can shop at the GAP in the youth section and be able to fit perfectly. I have to grab the stuff from the top shelf at the grocery store and at home. I really love dating him, but my friends all make fun of him and sometimes I just feel so self conscious when we are out because I think people are amused by the height difference. I also catch me and my friends saying short-related jokes and then catching ourselves. It is just always on my mind and I’m not sure I can get over the height issue. What can I do?

Shrimp Lover

Dear Shrimp Lover,

Wow, you and your friends seem like bitchy queens, no offense. LOL. Trust me, we gays are very judgmental and I have been a mean girl many many times. But I’ve learned. I especially got my karma after I gained that Covid weight and other gays pointed at my muffin top on the dancefloor. Here’s the thing. GET OVER IT. You said you love dating him but your FRIENDS have an issue? Girl, get over yourself. Who the fuck cares what your friends or anyone thinks? Do you know how difficult gay dating is? It sounds like you found someone you enjoy. To let other people’s opinions get in the way means that you are weak and maybe you don’t even deserve to date someone as good as Shorty. Short guys are cute and you can throw them around the bedroom. Height, age, and weight, are all up to personal opinion. Even some gays will find flaws in a top model. Who cares? It is how you feel. But it sounds like you have your own issues regarding his height as well. Sounds like you aren’t mature enough to handle someone outside of what people consider the norm. It sounds like you should stop trying to date people and instead focus on your own confidence. Or be a superficial bitch and date vapid queens. Send your guy my way, Pocket Gays are my jam.

_____

Dear Chad,

I just found out the guy I have been dating for two years has donated his sperm in the past, a few times. I don’t know why it causes me to pause, but it does. Is this something he should have told me? What if he has kids roaming around the world? It just is weird he didn’t tell me. Am I being the weird one?

Side of Sperm

Dear Side of Sperm,

LOL. If I disclosed everything I did in my past, I wouldn’t be dating anyone! Girl, we’ve all done things in our past. The past is the past. You didn’t know him at the time, he was living his life, making his own decisions. It isn’t like he had a relationship with someone and had a kid. He jerked off into a cup and then headed out to happy hour. What’s the big deal? He did what he thought was a good idea at the time. Just like I thought my tattoo of SpongeBob SquarePants was a good idea. Sometimes we are right, and sometimes we are not. And think about the gift of life he could be giving someone who can’t have kids. This has nothing to do with you and I think you are overblowing the gravity of the situation with him having to tell you. He told you know, what are you able to do about it? Move on girl. And if he wants to donate some sperm to me, have him call me. I love a good facial!

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