Sir Jet Talks Femininity, Being a Popstar, Porn, and Reality TV

Sir Jet is a singer, author, porn star, and queer pioneer. In a time when even gays were persecuting gays for being too femme, Sir Jet defied the queer status quo by fearlessly displaying her femininity. Seeing her chiseled hard body in sexy lingerie and heels now would give anyone a snail trail! So it's reasonable to say that we've come a long way as a community. And we have people like Sir Jet to thank for that. It was so fun doing this interview! Check out Sir Jet's answers below, then go stream Sir Jet's music and watch her content on OnlyFans, Just For Fans, and 4MyFans!

In the past, you’ve received a lot of pushback for presenting more feminine. Being one of the first people to bravely do so, what was the experience like working in porn at the time?

When I started, I was very much aware that the “shout-out to the lonely” cross-dressing Sir Jet would not be welcomed into this environment because of the popularity of the “straight-acting gay” image gay porn promoted, so I didn’t really promote that side of myself, as I thought it would hinder my chances of getting booked. Nevertheless, the fans knew who I was and what I do best. And they criticized me for holding back, so I started incorporating heels and lingerie into my sexual expression in my OnlyFans videos. It was rumored that this was the reason for me getting blacklisted, because I wasn’t staying true to the classic porn formula, and at the same time encouraging men of all types to explore their feminine side. The industry allegedly did not want people encouraging the empowerment of the feminine male.

How do you think the gay community has changed in regard to the acceptance of men dressing in lingerie/skirts/heels, etc.?

I think shows like RuPaul’s Drag Race have really changed the gay perspective with specific queens exploring their androgynous sides. I also think having more trans and non-binary representation in television shows and movies, including the most recent Disney release, Strange World, has made it more acceptable in society for a person in a male body to wear things like heels and dresses without it being for comedic relief. Gender non-conforming people have been used as a joke for so long in entertainment that it is very refreshing to see them as everyday people in these shows. I even saw the other day Andrew Christian is now selling mini-skirts, when we know they have had the reputation for being the “no fats, no fems” brand for years.

What are some of your biggest turn-ons in the bedroom?

I need to feel some level of connection with the person I’m with. When you can go between laughing at the awkwardness of sexual interaction and telling me you want to fuck my pussy, that’s when I’m turned on. I need that balance of silly and serious when I’m making love.

Your album “Empowered Bottom” was released in 2020. Can you share a bit about what inspired it?

Prior to starting my porn career, I never had to question being a bottom. I knew I was a bottom from day one and it was never an issue. Most men I was intimate with just kind of knew I was when they met me. When I started porn, not only did they ask me to fill out the form every time on my position, but I was constantly bombarded online by bottom-shaming messages. And I thought it was odd, because like I said I never really thought about it. I came up with the title “Empowered Bottom” as a way to say I can’t be shamed, that I like what I do and who I am, and being desired as a bottom makes me feel empowered. It was a way for me to find my strength in an industry where I’m constantly criticized for simply being myself.

In the music video for your song “Empowered Bottom” you reference people like David Bowie, Prince, Boy George, Freddie Mercury, and more. What was it like transforming into each of their iconic looks?

It was so much fun because I had never really had transformation looks done to me before. It was also the first time I’d ever worn wigs, which was a little surreal. What was cool was the minute the look was completed l felt transformed, and I began to embody that person in my facial expressions and body language, and I truly felt what it’s like to step into another person’s shoes.

Is it true that you were on an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker? What was it like filming a reality show?

Yes! They did a gay episode and I was one of the potential matches for Madison Hildebrand. For the most part, it was just sitting around for hours waiting for your turn to walk up to Patti and the judges, and when I did the whole interaction took less than five minutes. They told me I was ugly and looked better from far away, lol. I wish I could say more but I didn’t make it to the round where the candidates met Madison.

What’s more difficult? Shooting porn or shooting a music video?

Music videos are definitely longer days. I’ve done some that were almost 18-hour shoots. And of course, there’s a lot more prep work with costumes, make-up, and you often have to do each part over and over again to get variety, because the average music video changes scene every three seconds.

How has the porn industry changed since you first came onto the scene?

I honestly don’t know. Like everywhere else I’ve been in life, I’ve managed to become an outcast, and so overall I haven’t really been paying attention to what others are doing. I’ve seen my fair share of people doing things similar to me and getting really popular really fast, and it gets me down from time to time, but I don’t notice anything too different from now and five years ago, other than there seem to be more people doing it. But it’s still the same game: the popular girls get all the love and make all the money, while the unpopular struggle to succeed.

Do you have a preference between studio work or producing your own content?

What I loved about studio work was the performance. I loved doing the storyline, I loved blocking the positions ahead of time so I could know what had to be done in the time allotted. I would just do studio work if I could. What’s good though about content creating is I can wear nail polish, and I can choose what I’m going to wear, but overall I loved the structure of studio work, as well as traveling to set and having a full crew to shoot it, as I’ll always be an entertainer at heart.

In the mood to get all dressed up for
https://t.co/Pe96oHdTRJ https://t.co/VRZJISLPcA pic.twitter.com/xUSjvAQxsy

— Queen Sir JET (@iamsirjet) January 8, 2023

In your book, I'm Enough: How to Live Life Like a Popstar and Find Your True Self in the Process, you talk candidly about self-love, and your experience discovering your own inner popstar. What’s one thing you know now that you wish you could share with your younger self?

I honestly could write a whole book on all the things I wish I didn’t do, and the things I wish I had done. I’ve been in this career for over 20 years so I’ve experienced a lot. But if I had to share one thing with her it would be: stop being so blindly trusting of everyone you meet. There are more snake-oil salesmen out there than there are genuine people, and you really need to use your intuition in every situation rather than just taking a risk because you’re afraid to say no. Learn to say no to those people who rub you the wrong way.

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