F*cking with AJ Sloan: Conquering Performance Anxiety for Happy, Hardon Health

January 13, 2023
AJ SLOAN

You eat fairly well, you consider yourself to be fairly youthful, and you hit the gym, yet that flow seems to get lazy when it gets to that one area of your body where you want it the most. That’s right, your cock. I know some of you guys out there are more than frustrated, struggling to achieve or maintain a hardon when it matters most. Of course, there are innumerable factors that contribute to a limp dick, but today I’d like to discuss (queue the drumroll) performance anxiety.

We are all familiar with the fight or flight response that we, and all mammals, have evolved to do in response to situations we consider to be a threat to our safety. It is the reason you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach when you are not at ease, whether you are being mugged, going down that first hill of a roller coaster, or about to put your cock into the ass of your dreams. Your body is involuntarily rerouting the blood in your body to your muscles to prepare them to fight for your goddam life or haul ass out of there. You only have so much blood in your body though, so you can only guess where your is not going.

This worked out for our ancestors and our genetically similar relatives that still exist today, but things are a bit different for the modern human than they were back when we were chasing woolly mammoths and not ass. The modern man's body reacts to situations of stress and anxiety the same way it did tens of thousands of years in the past. This inability to keep it up due to psychological factors is also known as psychogenic erectile dysfunction.

At a moment when you are about to do what is arguably the most enjoyable activity that one can do with another human (or humans), one might wonder, why would one stress? Well, let’s see…

“Do I have a small cock?”

“I really like this dude, I hope I don’t ruin this…”

“Am I bad at sex?”

“God, I hope I don’t catch anything… again...”

“I don’t know if I can do this with a condom on…”

“Is my penis funny looking?”

“I really hope the camera catches my good side…”

“Why is my scene partner’s girlfriend on set?”

“Are they actually enjoying this or just pretending?

“I hope my mom doesn’t walk in”

The array of self-doubt, insecurities, and second guesses is vast, and all of them are valid. Even though our bodies’ hardware still has functions of our sympathetic nervous system that predate Wi-Fi and Grindr, other facets of our software have evolved and become more intricate. Although our ancestors may not have had to deal with boner-flattening modern-day stresses, they also most likely did not have the modern-day intellect to combat such stressors with self-reflection and introspection.

It’s important to take the time to check in with yourself for many reasons. Your dick is one of them. It is highly beneficial to periodically take the time to acknowledge your emotions and the catalysts that ignite them. Obviously don’t wait until your nuts are hovering over a lubed-up hole, that might not be the most ideal time for self-reflection. No, rather when you have the time to yourself, take the time to critically investigate the mental blocks in you that may be the cause of the flaccid effect. Meditate on it. To find a solution to an issue you must first acknowledge it.

Cardio is also your friend, and your penis’ friend too. During aerobic exercise, you breathe deeper and quicker, maximizing the amount of oxygen in your . Your heart beats faster which, in turn, increases flow to your muscles back to your lungs. This results in the widening of your small vessels. This also releases endorphins that function as natural painkillers that increase one’s sense of well-being. That was a lot of biology talk to simply say that cardio is good for your cock health. Just do it.

This last one is something that I have said repeatedly over many of my potty-mouthed blog entries but COMMUNICATE. Communicate with your partner. Communicate with your friends. Communicate with your therapist. More often than not, you will discover that others share the same cock-softening self-doubts and not-so-healthy patterns of thought that you find yourself with when your pants are around your ankles. Opening up with your partners, peers, and professionals is always a good idea. We are social beings after all. If we weren’t, I wouldn’t be writing this.

Well, that wraps up yet another edition of whatever we want to call this. As always, it was a pleasure, and I am looking forward to bumping into you again soon. If there is anything you like to share, please slide right up into my pre-lubed DMs. Have a great weekend, and happy hardons.

Xx,

AJ ❤️‍