When Madonna Fans Go (Very, Very) Wrong

There's a story creeping about the interwebs that one Madonna Louise Ciccone and her on-again, off-again brother Christopher had (at least!) one vaguely incestuous MMF threeway with a horsehung stud named Johnny, whom Madge would summon in the early days of her career when she was having voice troubles. Curiously, the original post that told the sordid tale has been removed, but thanks to our pals at Queerty we're treated to such juicy bits as "After our eyes glue to Johnny's huge snake, Madonna and I look at each other in amazement!" and "Suddenly, Johnny's moans become louder until I can hear Madonna make gulping noises ... Right after Johnny leaves, Madonna proceeds to sing and she sounds wonderful!" Now remember that this is only hearsay, or some particularly imaginative fan fiction: after all, we could never imagine that an oversexed power-hungry pop star and her creepy brother would ever do anything so crass. Much less something that involved watermelon. But really, what do we know? (queerty.com)