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Note To Porn World: It Is Not OK to Cum In Our Hair

PORNSTARS

There is nothing as sexy as a hot steaming facial, but the newest trend in porn cumshots is the "conditioner." Yes, that is when you take a load to the hair, and we are not at all pleased about it.

When we first saw this happen on Straight Hell (pictured here) we thought it was just another inventive way to humiliate their straight boys. Then it reared it's ugly head (ha) again on All American Heroes, and we realized that this is, like, a thing.

We're sorry but jizz in the hair is not cool. At least a facial feels all hot and creamy and kinda runny and awesome. And then after about 30 seconds (or 30 minutes, depending on your cum-fortability with it) you can easily wipe it off with a rag or a tissue, or a retro '70s striped tube sock (yum). But cum in the hair you can't even feel, so what is the point? And then you're never going to get it all out, so you either have to shower at your trick's house, or pull a "There's Something about Mary." Neither option is really acceptible. So, as much as we like taking your loads, gentleman, watch the hair. There has to be one area off limits.


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