Independence Day is a time to remember our past—which we'll translate as celebrating horny naked men through history. Harkening back to an era where men weren't scared of group nakedness, vintage male nudity has always sparked fireworks in our loins.
Today, American men aren't remotely comfortable getting naked together, even in non-sexual situations. Today gym locker rooms are all about changing under the towel. Beaches now have men in board shorts so long, they might as well wear pants. Back in the good old days, guys didn't care about group nudity, or even group nude photos. We'd die to know the context of each snapshot in our gallery, but time has left no clues expect the shots themselves, so we're free to interpret.
1960s: First up, the photo above looks like a rare snapshot from a gay bar circa 1968. Stonewall may be a year away, but these hunks weren't shy about a faggy stag party.
The 1950s: These boys weren't interested in hoop skirts and sock hops, but we bet a few took two straws in their chocolate malteds.
The 1940s: With the country at war, it's important to help your fellow man, especially if he's nude and rock climbing. Uncle Sam wants YOU, and we want THEM!
The 1930s: The Water Polo Team, often playing nude in the olden days, poses for their post game group photo—while naked in front of the whole leering crowd! Love Mabel's double take in the first row. As Cole Porter wrote in the nation's newest hit song: "In olden days a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking, but now God knows..."
The 1920s: Even 80 years ago, the boys sucked in their gut and crossed their arms to bulk up their biceps with their fists. That trick didn't start on Grindr, folks!
The 1900s: European athletes have long had the fine tradition of team photos in a group shower.
The Late 1800s: And you think today's Underwear Sex Parties are scandalous! Goes to show, there's nothing new under the sexual sun!