The Devil’s Grin: That Perfect Gay Porn Sex Sneer

It's not quite a grin, not quite a smirk, not quite a grimace.

I call it The Sex Sneer -- that look that just says "I'm a-gonna do bad things to you -- criminal things -- and nothing can stop me."

The look is less "Oooooooooh!" than it its "Raaaaaaawwwwr!.  Surprisingly, you don't really see the full-on Billy Idol contortion all that often on film, and it's even more rarely pulled off when attempted.   Maybe that's why Tom of Finland felt compelled to capture it on paper.   All the Botox and facial fillers that only succeed in ruining men's faces don't exactly help the effect.  You really need masculine features --  a square jawline with stubble, intense narrow eyes, lips that are wider than they are full -- so pretty boys are at a disadvantage.

Prolific '90s star Rob Cryston had hand's-down the best porn sneer I've ever seen.  It didn't matter whether he was actively rutting like swine or taking it hard from behind -- he'd curl up one side of his lips like the cartoon devil on a bottle of Satan Gold.  The guy just exuded surly, teeth-baring carnality, and you weren't sure if he was going to turn around and bite his castmate like a dog being mounted and in need of hosing off.

Strangely, as the economic crunch has driven mainstream porn to offer ever-riskier content, the men it employs have become less and less sexually threatening.  Clean-cut, smooth-bodied, doe-eyed Aberzombies are now de rigueur, and with that bland slickness, gay porn has really lost some of its edge.  I can understand the giddy thrill that viewers get from seeing Wonderbread jockos defiled, but for me, the best porn features men who don't look or even seem especially innocent.

Give me the cat that ate the canary over cute and fuzzy bunnies anytime.