Somebody Paid $1,000 To Smell Matthew Mitcham’s Taint In A Lightly Used Speedo

Here is proof that Tom Daley isn't the only Olympic diver that stays newsworthy in the off-season. His rival diver (and openly gay fantasy boyfriend) Matthew Mitcham hosted the Closing Gala for the Melbourne Cabaret Festival yesterday, and the event quickly turned from "semi formal" to "anything goes erotic pool party" as Mitcham ripped off his shirt and showed the room his bulge. For charity.

This neon green pair of "Funky Trunks" was up for auction at an inflated price, obviously because Matthew Mitcham's dick was inside them.

He wiggled his cute butt all over the stage to Aqua's "Barbie Girl" until a generous bidder coughed up $1,000 for this Holy piece of fabric that had touched Matthew Mitcham's giant dick and beautifully shaved asshole. Too bad he didn't offer $5 sniffs for the curious.

How much would you pay to smell Matthew Mitcham's taint? Would you jerk off in these Funky Trunks, or stash them in a Ziploc bag for safekeeping?

Is your dick hard? Watch this:

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