Dirty Science Friday: Those Tiny Bumps on Your Balls and Penis

Welcome to my new column, Dirty Science Friday. NPR's Science Friday is know for covering boring topics about dumb stuff. Dirty Science Friday, unlike normal Science Friday, will only cover Fleshbot-approved, dirty science-esque topics about bits, holes, and man fucking. 

For the inaugural Dirty Science Friday I wanted to pick a subject that I've noticed affects pretty much all men but that doesn't seem to be talked about very frequently. Whether it's your own balls that you cup gently while you jack off or your lover's pair that's shoved in your mouth, balls are everywhere. And most likely, if you look closely you'll see that they, as well as the base of a lot of dicks, have tiny bumps. At a certain age your coin purse started to get a little more fluffed out, a little fuzzy, a little lower, and may have gotten tiny raised areas. If you went to a public school like me the only sex education you had was learning that sex before marriage makes your your dick ooze and then fall off. Instead of making us even more afraid of the female sloppy joe, they should have been teaching us about what the fuck those tiny bumps were!

Fordyce Spots

A normal, healthy ball sac and dick base can have bumps caused by a variety of reasons. Fordyce spots are pinpoint-sized raised dots on appear on people's lips, *gulp* vages, scrotums, and on penises with varying degrees of visibility. Mostly depending on genetics (TRY not to think about that too much) you might have this particular type of raised area that doesn't necessarily correlate with a hair follicle and should be painless. Although a completely normal occurrence, some people who don't embrace their spots seek cosmetic treatment, which can be sometimes be achieved with laser removal. It's important to note that doctors do not recommend cosmetic procedures for Fordyce spots, mostly because they're kind of hot. 

Folliculitis

Folliculitis is another normal, although more visible, skin variation that can occur on your balls and dick base. This, unlike Fordyce, corresponds with hair follicles. Folliculitis can happen to varying degrees and is more or less a form of acne. Like acne, your sac hair follicles can get gunked up with excess keratin, but instead of getting a white head, you get a small, white, bulbous raised area at the base of each hair. SEXAY. If a guy feels self conscious about his folliculitis it can sometimes be treated with acne medications, but giving your balls a good daily scrub with a body wash containing salicylic acid or benzoyl peroxide can sometimes help. 

No matter what your balls look like they're beautiful, but if you have anything that you are concerned about always see a doctor, which I am not!